Bailey Walks On . . . .

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Barking at Dancing in the Rain

When I was trying to find music that I liked to use on the video montage of Bailey (see below), I happened upon a song on One True Media that I had not thought of in a long time. It was an instrumental version, but the words came back to me immediately, and they are so appropriate.

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared beneath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I the king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall

Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end, the way it all would go

Our lives are better left to chance

I could have missed the pain

But I'd of had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance

I could have missed the pain but I'd of had to miss the dance

(The Dance by Garth Brooks)

The very next day, I watched a video on Facebook and the background music was this same song.

Just a few days later, a friend on Facebook posted this quote from a friend of hers:

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.

It's about learning to dance in the rain!

The last couple years of our dance were not what I planned or wanted or hoped for or ever could have imagined, but I am glad I did not know the ending. If I had known, there might never have been a dance at all. I think we managed some dancing through the rain, and there was some barking at the rain at times, but overall? Over the 13 1/2 years we had?

I think we boogied!

Monday, July 27, 2009

How I Want to Remember Him

It has been 38 days since Bailey died, and I miss him as much today as I did that first day he was gone. Maybe even more, as I realize a little more each day what a huge hole his passing has left. I still expect to hear him barking when I open my car door in the driveway. I hear a doorbell ringing on TV and start to remind him that it's just the TV and not our doorbell. I wake up and he is not cuddled up against me on the bed. He's going to be a very hard habit to break.

What haunts me the most is remembering how horrible his last 24 hours were because of some really awful stomach issues. That was not how I wanted his last day to go at all! And that's not how I want to remember him. I don't want to remember the effects of degenerative myelopathy either. I want to remember him when he was healthy and all the really good years we had together.

Bailey L-O-V-E-D to play! He adored his toys and would learn their names within hours of receiving them. His two most favorite toys were his floppy Frisbee and Kermie, a big green frog with no legs. He came with long, skinny legs, but Bailey thought they were unnecessary and chewed each one off. I threatened to sew them back on but I never did.

I was sorting through all of my digital pictures of Bailey the other day while I was working on a photo book of the blog, and I found so many videos of him playing. I did not realize I had taken that many videos before he got sick, and I was so glad to find them. I took them with my digital camera that does not have a microphone so there's no sound, but just seeing him running and playing lifted my spirits and reminded me that DM was not his entire story.

This is how I want to remember my Bailey:

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Best Medicine

Thursday, June 25, 2009

His Obituary Would Read . . .

Bailey Asher Amory Taylor Trouble Davis, 13 1/2, died Thursday, June 25, 2009, following a long, courageous battle with degenerative myelopathy. He is survived by his loving mommy, grandmother, aunt, uncle, two cousins and a large extended family. Born December 21, 1995, he was a devoted companion, fierce protector, singer of songs, and flying Frisbee catcher. He was also a vocal opponent of UPS and mail delivery vehicles. He loved his 376 toys and knew each one by name. He was widely regarded as an extremely intelligent individual. He was thoroughly spoiled and his mommy would not have had it any other way. He will be sorely missed and never forgotten. He shall remain forever in the hearts of those who love him.

What we have once,

we can never lose.

All that we love deeply

becomes a part of us.

-Helen Keller

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Thirteen . . . and a half!

Today is Bailey's (half) birthday!!!! He is thirteen and a half. That seems impossible! Knowing that this will be my sweet boy's last (half) birthday, he got a very special treat. This is definitely a once-in-a-lifetime treat for him!

I went to the bakery yesterday and bought him a cupcake - yellow cake with buttercream frosting and sprinkles!

I put 13 and a half candles on top!

And lit them all . . .

Then I gave him this one, without the candles.

And, after listening to some very bad singing, he ate it . . .

Happy (half) birthday, my sweet boy! As I was placing candles on your cupcake, I couldn't help but thank God for 13 1/2 wonderful years with you. You have brought much JOY to my life and you will always, always be my baby. I am so glad I got to be your mommy.

I LOVE YOU FOREVER!

HAPPY HALF BIRTHDAY, BAILEY!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Off the Specified (or preferred) Route

I so needed to read this today:

http://www.mycharmingkids.net/2009/05/life-lessons-learned-from-navigation.html

This DM route is definitely not my preferred route, but God sees the highway through the field . . . .