It has been 38 days since Bailey died, and I miss him as much today as I did that first day he was gone. Maybe even more, as I realize a little more each day what a huge hole his passing has left. I still expect to hear him barking when I open my car door in the driveway. I hear a doorbell ringing on TV and start to remind him that it's just the TV and not our doorbell. I wake up and he is not cuddled up against me on the bed. He's going to be a very hard habit to break.
What haunts me the most is remembering how horrible his last 24 hours were because of some really awful stomach issues. That was not how I wanted his last day to go at all! And that's not how I want to remember him. I don't want to remember the effects of degenerative myelopathy either. I want to remember him when he was healthy and all the really good years we had together.
Bailey L-O-V-E-D to play! He adored his toys and would learn their names within hours of receiving them. His two most favorite toys were his floppy Frisbee and Kermie, a big green frog with no legs. He came with long, skinny legs, but Bailey thought they were unnecessary and chewed each one off. I threatened to sew them back on but I never did.
This is how I want to remember my Bailey:
