I'm too young to have a 13-year-old!

My Bailey Asher is 13-years-old today! I can hardly believe it. He's not very interested in toys now, except for his old favorites, so I wrapped up some treats and a Greenie and he loved his gifts!

I loved this picture of him holding his Greenie, still in the wrapping paper!

The aftermath . . . :o)

Finishing up his treats and checking the wrapping to make sure he didn't miss any!

Happy 13th Birthday, Bailey Asher!

You are my sunshine . . .

Choosing Thankfulness

Today, among many other things, I am thankful that I have shoes. I am thankful that, for reasons I will never know, God chose to place me in a specific spot in the world where shoes are a given for most people. And He went beyond that and placed me in a family where shoes were always a given for me. Even now, I have so many shoes that I probably could not name each pair in my closet if I tried. Sure I know the ones I wear regularly, but there are shoes in there that I haven't worn in a year. So it is hard for me to imagine an existence where shoes are a luxury.

But I've been to Piedras Negras, Mexico. I've seen people who would love a free pair of shoes or even just a hot meal. I've seen people who live in houses made of wooden palettes with no electricity or running water, kids whose faces, not just lips, were chapped from the cold wind blowing through those palette walls at night. I've seen a little boy, Daniel, shy and uncommunicative, who responded to a small bag of cookies by leaping into my arms and holding on for dear life to the love and caring that those treats represented. I've seen another boy, Oscar, a tough little guy, who was so excited to receive a free toothbrush and toothpaste that he rushed home from VBS, brushed his teeth, and came back to show everyone. I live in a country where most kids would laugh if you tried to put a toothbrush in their Christmas stocking or Halloween bag.

I don't know why God let me be born here instead of there, but I feel a responsibility to do whatever I can to share my blessings with others. And since walking is something we don't take for granted anymore because of Bailey's illness, I thought this charity was a perfect outlet. I hope you'll join me in making such a small donation that will literally change the day-to-day life of someone whose feet hurt.



"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.' "Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' "The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
~Matthew 25:34-40

REAL Hope for the Future

In Christ alone my hope is found.
He is my light, my strength, my song.
This Cornerstone, this solid Ground,
firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My Comforter, my All in All,
here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone, who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones he came to save;
'Til on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied -
For every sin on Him was laid;
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious day
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine -
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
'Til He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.

-In Christ Alone, lyrics by Stuart Townend and Keith Getty

His new nickname is Wonder Bay

I'm very excited to report that Bay Asher spent at least 30 minutes exploring the front yard in his cart last night! It was so nice to let him wander around for as long as he wanted without my arm and shoulder suffering for it!


Thank you, Abba, for hearing my heart's cry and answering it!

Eighteen Months

Saturday (10/4) marked eighteen months since Bailey's diagnosis of degenerative myelopathy. I am amazed that he is still with me so long after his diagnosis. As I have said before, I had a premonition that he would only be with me for 9 months, and it has now been twice that long! I definitely praise God for that. Unfortunately, the disease is definitely taking its toll.

Bailey can still get around the house on his own, but he mostly drags his back left leg and pushes off with his back right leg. It is amazing to see how quickly he can move that way when he wants something! I use a special leash or sling whenever he goes outside and sometimes when he has to go a long way in the house. He lets me know when he wants my help! The sling goes around his back legs and holds up his rear while he walks on his front legs. It has been an absolute lifesaver! At night, I use the sling to get him back to my bedroom and he knows there is a treat waiting on the pillow for him (to encourage him to get on the bed while he is in his sling and I can help him), so he takes off running for my room each night in search of his treat.

Bailey also has a cart, which he is slowly using more and more. We had some problems with it at first, but after emailing the company who made it, I made some adjustments and it works much better for him now. I can get him to walk over to the bench to get a treat, but he will not walk in it on his own much yet. A couple of weeks ago, I had him in his cart and he had walked in it several times for treats but then refused to go anymore. I assumed he was tired and took him out of the cart, and he immediately took off, in his sling with me running behind, to explore the yard. If I can just get him to explore IN his cart, it will be wonderful. I hate that his time walking outside is limited by how long I can hold his back end up, so I really want him to learn that his cart means independence. I have also put him in his cart while we were inside a couple of times, and he moves around pretty well in the house. He learned very quickly how to turn and manages to avoid objects most of the time.

He went to the vet last week and got a good report. She was impressed with how well he is doing, all things considered, and said she really could not take a fatalistic approach with him because he is adapting so well. I was very relieved when she said that because I was so afraid I was going to get the, "I think it's time..." speech that I dread whenever we go to the vet now. His ALKP (liver enzyme) was still high, but not as high as it has been. She and her staff were all excited to see him walking around in his sling.

So that's where we are. It is definitely not easy, but it is worth it because I still have my baby.

Favorite Recent Pictures

Bailey is 12 1/2 today!

Happy Half Birthday, Bailey!!!

New Discoveries

I found out on Friday that Bailey does not have Cushing's, so that is one less thing that he could have instead of degenerative myelopathy. I cried all afternoon at work and almost dreaded coming home and seeing him, knowing the results.

Of course, as soon as I walked in the door, I remembered why all of this pain is worth it. He barked excitedly to see me and I loved on him, gave him medicine and then took him outside. While we were out there, I noticed an odd little fruit and picked it up. I did not say a word to Bailey about it, but he immediately came over and wanted to smell it. He started licking it and tried to take it out of my hand so he could bite into it. When I closed my hand around it, he used his front paw to try and turn my hand around so he could get to it. When I moved my arm up high enough that he couldn't get to it, he barked at me. He really wanted to taste that little apple or whatever it was, though of course he was not allowed to eat it.

You can see him watching it as I move it back and forth in the video below. He really wanted it!

Today, we went outside and I tried to get him in his cart, but he did not cooperate. I was trying to lift his back legs into the cart while he was twisting and trying to get to the bowl of carrots. We ended up with his right leg in the left stirrup and then he tumbled with his leg caught and I was terrified he would break it. He whined and I turned the cart on its side to get his leg out. Thankfully, his legs were fine but he was having none of the cart after that. So I got him to walk on his own for the carrots. Then I laid out our blanket and we sat and watched as the sun broke through the dark sky and began to chase the clouds away. It started to sprinkle and I was ready to rush him inside before he freaked out over getting wet and before my hair got frizzy. Just then, a ladybug landed on our blanket and Bailey apparently made a new discovery. We found 5 or 6 of them and whether they were walking across the blanket, climbing a blade of grass, crawling around on my hand, or flying away, he watched in amazement. He put his nose very close to sniff each one but never tried to eat them. We forgot about the rain as we stopped to smell the roses, er, ladybugs!

It makes me smile to know that while he may be nearing the end of his time here with me, he is still making new discoveries all the time. And isn't that true for all of us? Sometimes they are even pleasant discoveries, like delightful little ladybugs or unexpected treats in the yard.

Oh Abba, when Bailey doesn't want to be here anymore, when life gets too hard for him, when he gets tired, please take him gently from me. Take him while he sleeps, curled up next to his mommy, with no pain or fear or awareness of what is happening. Please don't leave the timing up to me. I am afraid I will put it off too long, attempting to delay the pain of losing him, and I know that a stressful trip to the vet for a shot could never be a peaceful end to his sweet life. And I want his ending to be peaceful. He deserves that much.

And please help me to remember that I choose to praise You in this storm.

Praying for a Disease?

I never thought I would say this, but I have been praying earnestly for weeks that Bailey has Cushing's Disease.

He went in to the vet four weeks ago to have a big lump on his knee checked. It was a seroma, a non-painful sac of fluid caused by pressure when he rests his weight on his left knee with his foot out behind him. I thought it would be nothing major and was relieved to be right.

While we were there that day, his vet said that she had just had an unusual case where a dog had been unable to walk and they thought it must be a neck injury. The dog had tested negative for Cushing's several times before but consistently had an elevated alkaline phosphatase (ALKP) level, and something made Dr. VM do another Cushing's test. It came back positive, they started the lysodrine treatment and the dog is walking again.

Bailey has had 2 previous Cushing's tests two years ago due to his ALKP being elevated for about three years now. The first one was "probably negative" so I had her do another test and the result was negative. Two days after we were there for his knee, I dropped him off and they did another test. This one came back suspicious for Cushing's and the endocrinologist at Auburn suggested doing a different test. I took him in last week (to our vet, not Auburn!) and they drew blood every two hours in hopes of catching it if it is Cushing's.

I'm still waiting (anxiously) to hear the results of the second test and praying that it will be positive, that Bailey has Cushing's and not DM, and that the Cushing's will respond to treatment. Two years ago when we had our first Cushing's scare, I never thought I would be praying for him to have it. Of course, back then I had never heard of degenerative myelopathy. Cushing's is treatable so I will take it any day over something that we don't even fully understand and cannot cure.

Just chillin'

Drinking in bed . . .

It has been a year . . .

I can hardly believe that it has been one year today since Bailey was diagnosed with degenerative myelopathy. And what a year it has been! On April 4th last year, I wasn't sure if Bailey would still be with me today. The neurologist was vague that day about a time frame, which I now know was probably because the progression of the disease varies greatly with all dogs. For some reason though, I just knew he would be paralyzed or gone after 9 months. Praise God that it has been 12 months and he is still with me!

The disease has definitely started to take its toll on him though. His walk has gotten much worse in the past few weeks. His back left leg is almost devoid of muscle now. He sometimes drags it along as he walks because he is unable to bend it. Other times, he stands up tall and even runs if he is in a playful mood or chasing away the dreaded UPS truck. He is starting to wag his tail less than usual, but he does still wag it when his mommy comes home! He often uses it more for balance now, held low and swaying back and forth when he is unsteady. I think his bark has changed, but not as drastically as I expected. It may be a little hoarse or a slightly higher pitch, but he still sounds like the guard dog that he is.

On the positive side, he is still getting around on his own, only occasionally needing help from me. He still pulls toys out of his basket and plays with them. He loves to stay outside for an hour or more when the sun is shining and a breeze is blowing. I take a blanket out and when he has finished patrolling the yard, he comes and lies down on the blanket and contentedly watches the world go by. He still sleeps in my bed at night, though I had to put my mattress on the floor and move the box spring out. He also still does all of his bodily functions on his own, which we are both very glad about!

And, as if DM was not enough, he has also, in the last year, dealt with the horrible lesions on his face, lesions in his ears, a rash on his belly, and a UTI, all of which are problems of the past, thank goodness! His face is perfect again, though his chin keeps getting grayer. His ears are healing. His belly rash cleared up quickly thanks to daily Benadryl, and the UTI was knocked out with antibiotics.

Today definitely brings on a mixed bag of emotions. It hurts to remember receiving the news that day. It hurts even worse to see the diagnosis coming to fruition as he has more and more difficulty getting around. But this year has also given us lots of time together, with long walks at the park, sitting side by side in the sunshine, lots of snuggle time, extra hugs and kisses.

Thank you, God, for 365 days I wasn't promised with my sweet, sweet baby. Thank You for 365 days of coming home to a wagging tail and an exuberant bark, for 365 days of falling asleep with him beside me, for 365 days of his continued mobility and positive attitude.

And one year later, Bailey walks on . . .

Bed Hog

Can you guess how much sleep mommy got this night?

Bailey will be auditioning for the next Trail Mix Crunch cereal commercial soon . . . He just has to figure out how to get UNDER the covers!

The Many Faces of Bailey

I have been meaning to post about Bailey's face for a while now. The internet is finally working at home again, so it should be easier to update now.

I just wanted to praise God for healing Bailey's face. Here's what it looked like about a week after the bumps first appeared:

Here it is at its worst (following the biopsy which made it much worse):

And here's how his adorable and perfect face looks now:

Thank You, Abba, for using the cyclosporine to take away the awful bumps and the pain they caused. Thank You that my Bailey's face is healed and that the hair has even regrown!

I'm an aunt!

R K P

Born December 29, 2007

8 lbs. 2 oz. ~ 19 inches long

Absolutely perfect!

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